This is 39! Lessons Around the Sun

I recently celebrated my 39th birthday with my partner in Las Vegas, and honestly, the entire trip felt special from beginning to end. We went to see No Doubt perform at the Sphere, and the concert itself was unforgettable. The visuals, the energy, the music — it felt immersive in a way that’s hard to explain unless you’ve experienced it. It was one of those rare moments where you look around and realize life is happening right in front of you, and for once, you’re fully inside the moment instead of watching it through a screen.

At one point during the trip, my fiancé asked me a simple but powerful question:
“What do you want this next year around the sun to look like?”

I paused for a moment because it was such a thoughtful question. Not “What do you want to achieve?” or “What goals do you want to hit?” but what do you want your life to actually feel like?

And after thinking about it, my answer surprised even me.

I told her:
“I want to be more present.”

That answer may sound simple, but for me, it carries a lot of meaning. Over the last few years, I’ve spent so much time building, growing, healing, evolving, planning, and constantly thinking ahead that I realized somewhere along the way, I had become too connected to everything happening around me and not connected enough to the moment directly in front of me.

So this trip became a small practice in presence.

I stopped feeling the need to respond to every text message immediately. I allowed myself to step away from my phone and simply enjoy the weekend. Even during the concert, I noticed myself wanting to record every song, every visual, every moment because that’s what so many of us do now. We document life while it’s happening instead of fully living it.

But this time, I intentionally tried to put my phone down.

I took a handful of videos, but mostly I just stood there, sang the songs, laughed with my fiancé, looked around at the crowd, and let myself fully experience it. And honestly, I think that’s what made it memorable.

Presence is something I value differently now. Not everything meaningful needs to be captured. Some moments are sacred simply because you lived them fully.

Another thing I told her was that I want to deepen my friendships this year. This one feels especially important to me because growth changes people. Changing paths changes people. Healing changes people. And one thing I’ve learned over time is that not every friendship is meant to come with you into every season of your life.

That realization used to hurt me deeply. But now, I’m learning to accept it with more grace.

Some friendships naturally drift apart, not because someone is bad or wrong, but because people evolve differently. Priorities shift. Life changes. Sometimes paths simply stop aligning the way they once did. And honestly, I think that’s a very human part of life that many people quietly struggle with.

But the friendships that do remain — the people who continue showing up, loving you, supporting you, and growing alongside you — those relationships deserve care. They deserve intentionality. I want my friends to know I love them. I want them to feel supported, appreciated, and seen. The older I get, the more I realize meaningful relationships are one of the most valuable parts of life.

I also shared with her that I want to continue evolving in every area of my life. I want to continue growing in my relationship, continue learning myself more deeply, continue building my accounting company with intention and integrity, and continue repairing my relationship with my family — which is a story for another time, but an important one nonetheless.

What I’m realizing at 39 is that growth becomes less about becoming someone entirely new and more about becoming more honest with yourself. More grounded. More intentional. More aligned. You stop chasing perfection and start chasing peace. You stop trying to prove yourself constantly and start asking yourself what truly matters.

And maybe that’s what this next year around the sun is really about for me.

Being present enough to actually live my life while I’m building it.